Take #4: Love letter to the Nice/Shy Guy

I don't meant to be mean, but the nice guys are often the biggest of losers. No, no! Keep reading!
I was just thinking aloud. Every girl wants a nice guy and it's true - they do finish last, because we girls en up marrying them nice guys. Who wants to be stuck with a selfcentered jerk anyways? However, the million dollar question remains. What is the difference between a nice guy and a total suck-up? Or, more likely, how to be a "Nice Guy"?

A nice guy is a gentleman that does not allow anyone to get the best of him. He is "nice", but he has a limit. Y'know?
There are three types of people reading this...

❥ The loyal blog reader - thank you for choosing my blog to pass some time.

❥ The curious - I'm so glad you've found this post interesting enough to keep reading!

❥ And lastly, the lonely guy who's wondering why he is still single - sweetie, this is especially for you. (:

So you're wondering why you are still alone? Well, the answer is quite simple. In fact, there's a song about it.

"Live your life until love is found
Or love's gonna get you down"
~ Mika 

It couldn't be more true. You have to live your life and then find love, not search for love and resolve your life around it. 

I don't have many experiences of "love". Heck, I don't even know what it is anymore. However, I do have a few philosophies that you might (or might not) agree with.

The first is a comparison I find greatly appropriate. 

❥ Love is like keys. When you're looking for them, you won't find them, but when you don't, you do come across them.

I had three boyfriends so far and I noticed the other day how they each had something in common. They weren't popular, they were weird (out of the ordinary, in other words) and they were broken when I found them. The latter was the reason they started to irritate me.

If you take a dog (for example) with a broken leg and nurse it back to health, it will forever stay at your side. The problem is, to gain your attention, he goes and breaks his leg again. Do you see where I'm going with this?

Being emotionally dependent on another person is a very dangerous and a repulsive characteristic. Don't put the key to your happiness in someone else's pocket!
Why? Well, for the simple reason of growing up (maturing) and being your own person.
Individuality! That's what life is all about - expressing who you are and not giving that up for anyone.

So, my advice to you is...

❥ Gain some self-confidence - the courage to be yourself no matter what.
❥ Get a hobby and become somewhat ambitious about your goals in life.
❥ Stop trying to please others! Stop being a suck-up. 
❥ Lastly, but most important, fix yourself. It should be embarrassing to have someone do that for you.

However, don't do it for love. Do it for yourself. Love will find you if you are true to who you are and work hard on what you want to achieve in life.

Take #3: Personal Prep Talk

I love being young. When I meet people and they ask me my age they usually say something that differs between "oh" or "whoa! You're young". That makes me worry a bit, though - do I look like I should be older? Ah well...

One of my close friends is under the impression that you start dying after the age of 18. My opinion, that is when your life actually begins! ;D

You start to notice how much you've grown. Not physically (ok, that too), but emotionally as well. At first you were totally dependent on le Parents, later you rebelled and starting "hating" them for "holding you back". Now you start to see things from their perspective and the bond grows ever stronger WHILE still having all your freedom and independence you have gained by being a stubborn and so called "troubled" teen. It's time to grow up for real now. That means no anger tantrums, no crying your eyes out for stupid little boys...

This is it. This is the moment we've all been waiting for - that moment when you finally feel contempt with who you are as well as your circumstances. You understand and accept things you cannot change, and work hard to reach your hopefully-not-too-farfetched goals.

Looking back on my teen-life, I notice how I've changed, but then returned to whom I was (or am) originally. I've been (for arguement's sake, let's use stereotypical terms) a tomboy, goth, emo, scene, preppy, metalhead... but I find myself the happiest when I stop trying to be a part of some group or subculture, and instead just be me - a dreamer.

Come to think of it, I used music to channel through different moods (like metal gave me a surge of power and anger, whereas Gothic-classical music calmed me down to the state where I displayed no emotions). I still use that method - it is very effective when accompanied by a set of life-philosophies. At the moment I am focused on youth, innocence and adventure (well, sort of). I think those three terms best describe my style...

Anyway. I noticed how I keep telling people that I hate cameras and photo's when I'm in them and then end up taking a bunch of selcas. Well, the reason for this is self-motivation. Sometimes there are a few good ones and those are the ones I keep and put on Facebook or Twitter. (By the way, my Twitter ID is @ipetitpanda. Please follow! If you tell me you found me via my blog, I'll follow back!)

I've been considering myself as less than a lady, because most of my friends are guys. Truthfully, I have very few girl friends and it makes me sad. So, in a way, I have become my own best friend. Don't get me wrong - I'm not complaining. It certainly has its advantages - devotion to bettering oneself. lol

A dear online friend once told me~
"Better to suffer from the pain of discipline that the pain of disappointment."

Each of us has so much potential (despite your age). Another of my favourite quotes are from Michelangelo~

"Genius is eternal patience." 
"I am still learning."

Each of us can make a difference on society by making a difference in people's lives every day. So think about it and act upon it. Even a smile can bring a smile to someone's face. (:

Take #2: Cheer up a bit, will ya!

There comes a time in every teenager's life when he or she feels overwhelmed by life. It's normal! So quit chanting "nobody understands me", "nobody cares" and all that crap. You're fooling no one but yourself.

There's a reason to this stage of life and that is to figure yourself out, accept what and who you are and decide who you want to become. It has absolutely NOTHING to do with the way others perceive you (whether they like you or not). The sooner you stop expecting things from others and snap out of that self-pity stupor, the sooner we can all move on. M'kay?

 So what if the "love of your life" cheated on you? You are still young and there are more than 6 billion people in the world! Why settle for one so soon? There's no rush, so go out there and have some fun! Everyone you meet is a potential friend. (:

Stop complaining! Accept what you cannot change and improve where you can. Why do you hate school? That idiot in front of the class is trying to help you to build YOUR future. Be grateful for that and do your best. If you need motivation, make a list of things you'd like to achieve and work hard to reach those goals.

Treasure your friendships and family. They will give you grief, because they are not life-like robots programmed to please you. If you want them to treat you with respect, treat them as if they were the Queen of England. Err... sort of. Be careful not to become a people-pleaser, though.

If something terrible happens to you, don't see it as a dip in the roller-coaster ride of life. Instead, see it for what it is - a learning process. You are influenced 10% by what has happened to you and 90% of how you react to it.

Did you know you have 14 minutes of expressing true emotion after something had happened? Your brain gives off chemicals to trigger emotions and those chemicals are used within 14 minutes. Everything after that is self-inflicted.

 14 minutes later~~

The 14 minute rule applies to everything, by the way. Unless you're one of those people who needs a few minutes to register a joke, catch it, and then laugh. xD

Yay for those with Delayed Reaction Syndrome! You just got 5 more minutes to cry your eyes out...

Speaking of which, laughing 15 minutes is equal to sleeping for 2 hours/ Let's get 'em jokes crackin'! I'll leave you with this random music video now. Enjoy! ;D

Take #1: The truth about Dating

Right. I got this!

My first post will be dedicated to them shy ladies all around the globe!

You are frustrated out of your mind and cry yourself to sleep with loneliness. Wait, what?

Snap out of it! If you want a guy, get one - it's not that hard. If you like a specific guy, formulate a strategy and put it to the test.

The number one rule and cliche of dating.

Be yourself! Do you have freckles on your shoulders? Flaunt them! Do you have an accent? Show it off! Do you have an acne problem? Well, fix that.

Being oneself isn't as easy as everyone makes it seem, but it doesn't have to be that difficult either. For many it starts on the outside. You can say what you will, but it's true. Yes, personality is important, but if you feel you can't be confident if you don't look good follow these simple guidelines...

❥ Stay away from sweets, smoking and alcohol! Cigarettes and alcohol makes you age faster. No, not your real age, but the age of your skin. To keep it wrinkle free (most of the time) eat a lot of fresh veggies and do exercise! Sweets and oily foods give you pimples and uneven skin tone. Cut it out of your diet and replace it with fruits (not too much!) and water. Omega oils will also help fight the aging of your skin. Try it out! Get your facts straight - eat a healthy and balanced diet (instead of those "get thin in a few weeks"-types that deprive you of the nutrients your body needs), and train hard. It helps to make a collage of things you want to achieve like that perfect abs, y'know?

❥ Drink 2 liters of water a day. If you get tired of that, add some flavour to it by adding a few drops of freshly squeezed lemon juice to it. Or if you really get nauseated by the taste of water even when "tempered" with, try traditional Chinese Herbal tea. There are many flavours to choose from and it serves as a great detoxing agent. Be careful of over doing it as intense detoxing might put you into a coma.

❥  Smile. It never hurts to smile. (And please, someone tell that to Kristen Stewart! haha) Smiling works out 25 muscles and makes you feel happier! Smile and laugh more and allow your positive energy to shine out from the inside - that is true beauty! After all ~ smiling is contagious! (:

Okay, how to approach a guy? The FamousAmos has the answer to that!

A summary:

❥ Become the hunter, but don't do something too crazy

❥ 3-Second rule to make an impression

❥ Compliment him

❥ Introduce yourself

❥ ASK OPEN-ended questions

❥ Go with the flow

If you think you have ruined your first impression with your crush, don't worry about it! Impressions can be remade!

Being yourself can be stressful. You might fear rejection or becoming an outcast. Truth is, there isn't a thing such as being "normal". What might seem totally irrational to you, might be completely normal to another person. Being the true you has benefits beyond the dating industry. You can make real life-long friends and be contempt with what you have and who you are even when you are alone.

Who are you?

Well, for those of you who are still struggling with that question, ask yourself this first:

❥ How do you react in given situations? Our actions determine how others see us - it is through our presentation that we can express ourselves. Presentation is very closely tied with appearance, but it is something completely different. Appearance is what you wear and what you look like, whereas presentation is all about how you wear it and your own perception of yourself shining through. Remember - our bodies are only vessels for our souls.

❥ What do you like and dislike? Make a list of things you like and really don't in people and about life. These things should be flexible, so don't go overboard with them. Then, try out new things! Try it, you might like it. ;3

❥ Compile a list of four or five things you would like to witness in your ideal guy (or girl). Don't only jot down physical attributes. Then weigh yourself by the standards you have set for him. If you wrote "adventurous", do you like exploring the great outdoors yourself? If you wrote "playful", are you as free-spirited as you want him to be? 

Lastly, but definitely not least - be courageous enough to be YOU. Yes, you heard me. If you know you aren't being true to yourself, I am calling you a coward. Prove me wrong!

Over and out. (: